Heart or Mind?
by Proud Pinoy
Summary: A girl named Tamayo...two guys...one decision. Will she go with her heart or what she thinks is good for her family?
1. First meeting

**Decisions **

It was autumn, and it was the first day of school this year; the last year of Highschool I'll ever have. It was sad to think, but it often struck me that I was becoming older and older, not knowing what I'll really do in my life when I graduate from Highschool, maybe I'd go to university, not really sure, but hey, I still have a long way to go, I'm not that old yet. By the way, my names Tamayo and in Japan it means precious generation. Well, anyways, where was I? Oh, yes the story, I totally forgot about that, enjoy it, yeah? I think it'll be interesting, but I'm not sure, haha, I talk a lot, okay enjoy…

Autumn…first day of school…last year of Highschool…

I had woken up with a headache and everything was ringing. I pulled myself together and jumped out of bed. The floor under me creaked each step I took and outside, I could see the trees swaying from side to side…looked like it was going to be windy today. I got dressed into my school uniform, putting my jumper on for warmth and then brushing my teeth and fixing my hair neatly…

After, I went downstairs where my mum was in the kitchen, cooking one of her crazy dishes. I don't know why she does this, but at least it keeps her busy from thinking about my father who had walked away from the family to be with another woman. I'd never forgive my father for what he did to me and my mum. My mum suddenly looked up from her cooking and smiled at me.

"Good morning Tamayo, first day of school, have fun and come home safely," mum said in a cheerful tone.

"Morning mum, yes, I'll come home safely. Bye," I replied back.

I walked up to the table, grabbing a pear from the bowls and then grabbed my bag and headed outside to walk to school. I wasn't excited to go to school and it was sad that it would be my last year of Highschool, but, the saddest thing was, that I never got to tell my "crush" that I liked him…his name was Rey and he was one of the popular's, but it wasn't like he noticed me, he already had a girlfriend…Marie.

Marcie was one of those people teacher's loved; most of the student population loved, but was hated by "us" the people at the bottom of the pyramid. The pyramid was a big thing in my school (I didn't really care; it was total nonsense to me) and it classified people in each of the three levels of the pyramid. Here's how it goes…at the top of the pyramid was practically the King and Queen of the school, which in my view and all the others view would be Rey and Marcie. In the middle of the pyramid would be by the Kings and Queens followers a.k.a friends and at the bottom would be the people who didn't care about what they were "classified" as, which would be me. This is how the pyramid works…lame, I know.

The walk wasn't very long to school, at least a ten minute walk there. On the way there, I accidently hit a guy on a bike. Okay, it was an accident, it's not like I did it on purpose…it wasn't my fault he was practically "bike speeding" while I was stretching. Anyways, I had to help him…I wasn't that mean.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Are you okay?" I asked, helping the guy up.

"Ouch, yeah. I'm fine, you should really watch out where you're stretching," he replied back.

He stood up, brushing dirt of his clothes and the picking up his bike from the floor. It was then, that I realised he went to the same school as me; Trinity Highschool, but I had never seen him before.

"My names Jay by the way," he said, holding out his hands, smiling.

"My names Tamayo," I replied back, shaking his hand…smiling too.

"Haha, cool. Nice to meet you," he said.

"Yeah, nice to meet you too. Hey, do you go to Trinity Highschool?" I asked.

He looked down at his uniform, and looked back up with a dumbfounded expression.

"Looks like it," he said, smirking.

"Oh, really, because I've never seen you before. What year are you in?"

"Yeah, I'm in Year 12; I'm a new student, so that probably explains why you've never seen me before," he said, smiling again.

"Oh, okay then. So today's your first day, I guess,"

"Haha, yup, it is. Want to walk with me to school?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure…why not," I replied back.

We started walking again and this time, he wasn't riding on his bike, he just moved it alongside him. Before we knew it, we were at school. Everyone looked happy and excited for a fresh, new year of Highschool. I told Jay where to put his bike and we headed for our "new" lockers, which we had to look for. It wasn't very hard looking for my locker, seeing as my last name started with an 'A' but Jay had some difficulty, seeing as his last name started with a 'P,' so we both searched for it together. We found it in no time. Jay had put his things in his locker and was looking around the school.

"Anyways, where you off to now?" I asked Jay.

"Um, I'm supposed to go to the Student Office to fill out a couple of papers, but I don't know where it is," he replied back.

"Oh, okay. Want me to take you there?" I asked.

"Sure, if you don't mind,"

"Haha, I don't mind. Got nothing else better to do anyways," I said.

We walked to the Student Office together and he seemed to like the school, because he was smiling. I, on the other hand was looking for my best friend, Anne, but it looked like she wasn't at school yet.

"Um, so what school did you used to go to?" I asked, bringing up a topic to talk about.

"Um, St. Joseph's, the one near the big shopping centre," he answered, smiling again.

"Oh, yeah. I know that school, my friend goes there,"

"Oh, really. I might know her, what's her name?"

"Um, it's Maria," I said.

"Oh, I know her. She's actually the reason why I moved." He said.


	2. Friends?

"Oh really, why?" I asked him, suspiciously.

"Well, because I was madly in love with her, but she broke my heart saying she was in love with my best friend and it just felt really awkward being around her; especially when my best friend was there. Plus, my parents think that the education there is too bad, and that this school has a good reputation," he answered.

"Oh, okay. So, she knew you liked her?" I asked.

"Yeah, she did," he said.

"Oh, well…I'm sure you'll find someone else just as good as her," I said, trying to cheer him up.

"Thanks," he said, smiling.

"Well, here we are…the Student Office," I said.

"Thanks heaps. You don't have to stay with me if you don't want to," he said.

"No, it's fine. I want to," I replied back.

"TAMAYO!" I heard someone say from far away. I turned to look at where the sound was coming from, and there I saw my best friend, Anne. She was running towards me and we hugged each other for a while.

"Tamayo! Hey, how were your holidays? I haven't seen you in ages, you look really different," she said.

"Haha, hello. Yeah, my holidays were fine, but you know, I did the same boring things," I replied back.

"Oh, okay then. Well, my holidays were great and yeah, I'm just so happy to see you,"

She looked behind me at where Jay was standing and then smiled.

"Oh, my. Whose that hottie behind you that's looking right at us? I've never seen him before," she asked.

Hottie? I turned back to look at him, like really look at him. Wow, he was pretty good looking. The messy, spikey hair, the muscular arms and the "good looking" face. I guess he was…hot.

"Oh, well. This is Jay," I said, motioning for him to come forward.

He walked towards us and stopped; standing next to me. Anne looked at him interestingly and Jay smiled back, holding out his hand.

"Hello, I'm Jay. Nice to meet you," he said to Anne.

"Hey, I'm Anne…Tamayo's best friend," she replied back, shaking his hand in return.

"Cool, well, I have to go to the Student Office, but I'll catch up with you later, Anne. See ya," he said.

"Okay then, see you laters Jay," Anne said waving at him.

I bet she was going to talk about him when he walked into the Student Office…5, 4, 3, 2, 1…TALK

"Whoa, okay…how do you get a guy like that?" Anne asked.

Haha, knew it ;]

"Haha, I didn't get him. I accidently hit him while he was riding on his bike and I helped him up and all that and we started talking. That's all,"

"Oh, that's a shame. You going to hook up with him?" she asked, excitedly.

"What! No, I don't even know him," I said.

"Haha, sure sure. Anyways, he's coming back out, so I better leave you too alone and get going. See ya laters," she said, winking at me.

She walked of shouting and screaming with happiness. Jay was standing next to me, grinning.

"Wow, your friends loud, is she usually like this?" Jay asked me.

"Nah, she's not. It's probably just because it's the first day of school, and yeah. You done with the Student Office?"

"Yup, I'm done. What homeroom are you in? I'm in 12.12," he said.

"Cool, I'm in that homeroom too,"

"Haha, looks like your stuck with me then," he said, cheekily.

"Yup, looks like it," I replied back.

We walked around more; me telling him about school life in Trinity Highschool, co curricular activities and some other things while he was looking around; listening.

. . .

We all sat down in our seats at homeroom, Jay sitting next to me. I looked around the classroom to see everyone's faces, I knew most of the people in class, but I wasn't close friends with them.

The teachers had walked in…great, it was Mr. Dunningham ==" He was probably one of the boringest teachers ever. What's with him and wearing a suit. He introduced himself to the class and then called out the homeroom role. I looked over at Jay after I had shouted "here" at my name; he gave me a piece of paper.

_Jay: Hello. I'm bored. This guy isn't very entertaining. _

I smiled at his note and replied back…

_Tamayo: Hey. Yeah, same here. Yeah, this guy is very boring…I had him once for history/geography last yeah and I literally slept in class ==" But, hey, it's not like I'm entertaining either._

_Jay: Oh, haha. I hope I don't get him for history/geography then. Nah, your definitely entertaining. _

Eh? I'm entertaining? Well, that's the first.

_Tamayo: Haha, thanks. _

. . .

Before the end of homeroom, we got handed our time tables. I looked at mine and Jay's timetable and it looked like we were in all the same classes except for history/geography. Haha, Jay got Mr. Dunningham.

"How luck am I, I'm in most of your classes," Jay said, smiling.

"Yup, looks like it. But, you have Mr. Dunningham for history/geography," I replied back, giggling.

"Oh, shoot, I do. Oh well, at least I still have you in most of my classes,"

"Haha, yeah."

After discussing about teachers, the bell had rang and me and Jay got up to go to our next class; maths. We went to our lockers to get our books. Everyone was rushing around like lunatics; trying to get to class earlier…it was hard trying to walk through.

. . .

Me and Jay arrive at class just in time, but everyone was already seated and there were only two spots left…all the way at the back, but at least they were next to each other, so I wasn't a complete loner in the class, I had Jay, I guess. I looked around again at all of my class mares, there was no one in my class I had a close friendship with ==" how sad, I really need to socialise more.

Me and Jay walked to our seats…we sat down and waited for our teacher Mrs. Morgan.

"So, is Mrs. Morgan a nice teacher?" Jay asked me.

"Yeah, she's pretty good," I answered.

"Oh, cool. Um, so…we're friends right?" he asked.

"Yeah, of course we are," I said.

"Okay then, that's good,"

"Yup,"

Mrs. Morgan, walked into the room, and called out the class role. Again, me and Jay were passing notes to each other in class. Even though, I did say Mrs. Morgan was okay, class was still boring…

_Jay: Hello again. Sorry, bored…again, haha. _

_Tamayo: Haha, it's fine, I'm bored too. Let's just conclude that every class is going to be boring :L_

_Jay: Haha, okay then :L_

_Tamayo: Um, anyways...do you get what she's saying?_

_Jay: Ugh, sorta…can't really explain it though, I could try._

_Tamayo: Okay, can you teach me at lunch? In the library?_

_Jay: Haha, sure. _

_Tamayo: Thanks heaps._

_Jay: Haha, it's cool. _

Mrs. Morgan was still explaining how to work out the solution after ten minutes…maybe she was a boring teacher ==" everyone else seemed to think so, none of them were listening.

_Tamayo: Haha, no ones listening to miss :L_

_Jay: Haha, yeah…I see that. _

In the end, we only had ten minutes to do our work, which was pretty sad, but at least the rest of the lesson was a bludge.

. . .

When the bell rang, everyone rushed out and again, everyone was running around like lunatics trying to get to class early. Jay looked like he wasn't having any trouble at all, walking through the big crowd in the hallway, but I was being trampled on, pushed at and many many more things…it was a pain in the ass, but, when I finally reached class, only half of my classmates were there…I considered that to be early. Again, me and Jay sat next to each other, so we could pass notes to each other.

Our teacher walked into class five minutes late and he, like all the other teachers; called the class role, while he was calling it out, I sent a not to Jay…

_Tamayo: I figured, I should send you a not first __ haha. Anyways…do you play any sports?_

_Jay: Lol, cool. Um, yeah, I play basketball and soccer. Do you?_

_Tamayo: No, but I love playing basketball with friends and all that._

_Jay: Oh, cool…maybe we could play together some time, I could share you some tricks I learnt from my friend._

_Tamayo: Haha, that would be nice. _

_Jay: Cool. _

_Tamayo: You liking the school so far?_

_Jay: Yeah, it's pretty good, but, so far, I only have one friend…you._

_Tamayo: Yeah, don't worry, you'll get used to it, I only had one friend too, before you came along, now I have two xP_

_Jay: Oh, really? Why's that?_

_Tamayo: Not sure, really…I guess, it's cause I don't socialise much._

_Jay: Oh, okay then. So, you saying, if you didn't knock me over my bike we wouldn't be friends?_

_Tamayo: Haha, probably, but you might never know…the teachers might have made me be your "buddy" for the day._

_Jay: That's true. Um, have you ever had a boyfriend before? _


	3. Who's your crush?

Why was he asking me if I had a boyfriend?

_Tamayo: Um, no…I've never had a boyfriend, haha, why?_

_Jay: Oh, nothing…just wondering…_

_Tamayo: Okay, then…cool. Have you ever had a girlfriend?_

_Jay: Nop, never…well, I mean…girls have asked me out, but I've never found the right one…_

_Tamayo: Oh, okay then…_

That was the end of our conversation during the whole lesson…this time we paid attention…shocking, I know. At the end of the lesson though, we had a couple of minutes of free time, so me and Jay just talked.

"So, we still on for lunch?" Jay asked me.

"Yeah, sure," I replied back.

"Okay, cool. What do you usually do in recess?"

"Um, well…nothing. I usually just talk to Anne, or if she's not around I'd read,"

"Oh, cool…I'll join you guys, since you guys are the only people I know,"

"Haha, I'm pretty sure you'll get to know a lot of people soon,"

"Hope so," he said, smiling.

At the sound of the bell, everyone got jumped off their seats and rushed out the door. Many people were going too their lockers, so, it wasn't as crowded as before…when everyone was trying to get to class.

I bumped into Anne on the way to my locker…

"Hey Anne, you going to stay with us for recess?" I asked her.

"Hello, um, stay with "us" meaning you and Jay? Nah, I have more exciting things to do, no offence," she answered.

"Oh, okay then…that's fine," I said.

"Hello Jay, you take care of her, okay?" she told Jay.

"Hello, nice to see you again. Haha, I sure will," he replied back.

Anne walked off; leaving me and Jay standing in the middle of the crowd. It took at least five minutes or more to reach our locker, and still there was a big crowd around the locker area. It took some screaming and shouting from the teachers until they all moved away from the lockers and sat somewhere else. I could finally move freely without someone pushing me or trampling on my feet, and I'm sure Jay felt the same way.

. . .

I and Jay sat near the Year 7 buildings, eating our recess and chatting.

"Do you like anyone?" Jay asked.

Well, I did, but I wasn't so sure if I was going to tell him I did, but, I guess it wouldn't hurt anyone if I told him, hopefully.

"Um, yeah…I do, why, do you?" I answered.

"Oh, I'm just wondering, I want to get to know you better, since were friends and all. Um, no…I don't think I do. What does it feel like to have someone precious to you?" he asked me.

"Um, well…it's a pretty overwhelming feeling. You feel happy when you see that person or even hear that person's voice; and every time you look at them your heart beats faster and faster, and yeah. Well, that's love for me, I guess it's different for everyone," I said, looking at him.

"Wow, that's…sweet. I don't think I've ever felt that way with anyone before, not even Maria, but I hope I will one day," he said to me.

"Haha, yeah. I hope you do too. Um, if you didn't feel that when you were around Maria, then how did you feel around her?" I asked him, hoping it wouldn't upset him.

"Oh, well, it felt…(pause) I'm not really sure. I always thought it was love, but I don't know if it really was or if it was just my mind playing tricks on me," he replied back, confused.

"Well, when I see the person I like, it's like I've been hiding in total darkness and he just brightens it up for me,"

"Okay, I've never felt that before. Wait, if you like him that much, why don't you ask him out?" he asked.

"He has a girlfriend," I answered.

"Oh, and your okay with that?"

"Well, I guess, it doesn't really matter. I mean, if you like someone so much, you just want them to be happy; even if it means seeing them with someone else. I guess, that's good enough for me," I said, thinking about Rey.

"I guess that's true. Anyways, let's walk around, I need a good exercise," he said; standing up and stretching.

"Sure, I guess it wouldn't hurt," I said, standing alongside him; stretching too.

We both walked around the school, laughing, smiling and simply…taking. It was good to have someone like Jay around to talk to.

"Haha, so…in the end, his face was filled with mud and his mouth had grass in it. I tried not to laugh, I really did," Jay said, laughing.

"Haha! That's funny, I said; laughing with him.

"Yeah…do you have any funny stories?" he asked me, smiling.

"Sadly, I don't. My life is pretty boring," I answered.

"Oh, that's okay. We can always make you some funny memories," he said, still smiling at me.

"Yeah, I guess we could," I said, smiling back.

"So, you going to tell me who you like?" Jay asked me.

"No, I'd rather you guess.

"Okay then…him."


	4. Questions

"Okay then…him," he said, pointing at a bunch of guys at the table.

"Which one," I said.

"The one sitting next to the girl…Rey," he said, smiling.

Okay, how did he know that? I've seen some pretty freaky things in the past, but that is just freaky…

"How…did you know that?" I asked him, shocked.

Easy…those guys over there are what some people might call "popular and he had a girl sitting next to him…his girlfriend," he answered.

"Oh, okay then; but how did you know his name?"

"He's my cousin," he answered.

WHAT! Rey and Jay were cousins! Oh great ==" could my life get more complicated than it already was?

"Wh-wh-what? You guys are cousins?" I said, still shocked by the fact they were cousins.

"Yup, we are. Hm…looks like he's coming this way," Jay said.

I turned to where Jay was looking and believe it or not Rey was walking this way, Damn! He was coming this way…was I blushing? Did I look fine? Why was he coming here in the first place?

He stopped walking and stood in front of me and Jay; he looked at Jay with a heavy smile.

"Hey cuz. Long time no see…you look good," Rey said to Jay.

"Hi, yeah…you too cuz," he replied back.

"Well then, it looks like you've met Tamayo. Keep her happy, okay?" Rey said, smiling at me.

"Yeah, I will,"

"Okay, well…I better get going, but I'll catch up with you later. Cya," Rey said; winking at me before walking away.

I hope I wasn't blushing or worse…smiling and blushing; especially in front of Jay.

"Do you…love him?" Jay asked me; looking at me sternly.

Did I love him?

"I…don't…know. I didn't love him before, he was just a simple crush, someone I thought was good looking, but, now, I just don't know," I answered.

"Oh, okay then…that's fine. Anyways, let's go to class now, it looks like the bell is going to go any minute now," he said, smiling at me.

"Haha, sure," I replied; smiling back.

. . .

When the bell had ringed everyone was rushing to get to class, I, on the other hand was sitting in class with Jay, talking to him about some random stuff.

"Yeah…um, anyways, what you doing this weekend?" Jay asked me.

"Um, nothing, I think…why?" I answered.

"Oh, I just wanted to know if you'd like to go to the movies with me,"

"Oh, just the two of us?"

"Um, if you want…totally up to you thought," he said.

"Oh, okay then…um, I'll check tonight with my mum and get back to you soon,"

"Okay, cool," he said; smiling.

The rest of the class had come late-ish, and so did the teacher.

. . .

The lesson was a total bludge; most of my classmates were sleeping, chatting or just doing nothing. The best part about it though was that the teacher didn't care. I hope all lessons were going to be like this one.

"Anyways, I'm bored. I like this teacher, we can do whatever we want and he wouldn't care. Haha," Jay said.

"Haha, yeah, I guess," I replied back.

"Oh, we have history/geography next, the only class I wont see you," Jay said.

"Haha, yeah…I just hope I have somewhere there that I know and can talk to, like I can talk to you. Oh, and don't forget…lunch, library, okay? I'll meet you there," I said.

"Yeah, I hope so too. Right, yeah…I'll see you at the library. Are we allowed to eat there?" he asked.

"Um, no, but there are seats at the front, we can eat there before going in,"

"Oh, okay, cool…then I guess we'll meet there,"

"Yup," I said; smiling.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" he asked.

"Um, anything, I guess," I answered.

"Ohkay then, let's talk about you,"

"ME! But, I'm boring; I can't be interesting to talk about,"

"You might never know unless you try," he said; smiling.

"Oh, fine…what about me?"

"Hm…do you have any siblings?" he asked.

"Nah, I'm the only child, haha…pretty boring," I answered.

"Oh really, I'm an only child too,"

"Oh, cool…is it just me or are we always bored?"

"Yeah, I feel the same way too. Um, what's your favourite colour?" he asked.

"Hm, that's hard. I like a lot of colours, but, for me it would probably be blue, what about you? What's your favourite colour?"

"Haha, mine would probably be…red, but it changes frequently, and yeah,"

"Oh, okay…cool. Anymore questions?" I asked him.

"Um, let me think…oh, have you ever had your first kiss?" he asked me.

"Nop, I've never been kissed, you?"

"Nah, like I said, haven't found the right girl yet," he said; grinning.

"Right, when do you think you will find the right one" I asked.

"Soon. Anyways, you're not asking the questions, remember, I am. Haha, um…play any instruments?"

"Haha, I play the piano, that's about it, you?"

"Haha, I play the piano also, and I also play the guitar, violin, ukulele and the drums, so yeah, but I mostly play the piano, guitar and violin," he said; smiling his smile.

"Wow, cool, that's...a lot. How'd you learn so many?"

"Parents…they wanted me to be musical, but, hey, I actually enjoy playing them, plus it makes me feel talented,"

"Haha, I'm sure it does," I said.

"Anyways, favourite animals?"

"Um, mine would have to be a…dugong, I don't know why, I guess there just mysterious. What about yours?" I answered.

"Does a dragon count?" he asked.

"Well, depends…could you look after a dragon?" I said.

"I suppose you could,"

"Oh, okay…then I guess it does count," I said.

"Haha, cool,"

The bell had ringed for period four, damn, I wanted to continue my conversation with Jay, I guess we had to do it later.

"Oh, there goes the bell. I guess I'll see you at lunch time near the library, cya," I said to Jay; waving and smiling at him.

"Oh, yeah, sure…cya at lunch," he said; smiling back.

We walked off in different directions; me going to the year 11 blocks, Jay going to the year 8 blocks. As I was walking there, I hoped I had someone I knew in my class.

. . .

I fell to the ground; accidently bumping into someone. I didn't know who it was, but when I looked up everyone stopped walking and looked at me. I saw a guy standing in front of me, smiling and holding his hand out. I couldn't quite see who the guy was until I stood up…


	5. Relationship counselor

…Rey.

He was there, in front of me…helping me up and he was smiling…not at anyone else, but me…ME! I took his hand and stood up, conscious, still, that everyone was looking at me. I smiled back at him. I took my hand away from his, when I had realised it was still there.

"Are you okay?" he asked me; smiling.

"Yeah, I'm fine, thanks," I replied back.

"Okay then, that's good. What class do you have now, I can walk you there if you want me to," he said.

"Oh, I have history/geography. It's fine; I don't want you to be late for class,"

"It's fine, really. It looks like I'm going there too, I guess were classmates for that subject,"

Woo hoo! I had Rey for one of my subjects. I was pumped up and read to roll. I walked with him to class, and people were looking at me like I wasn't meant to be walking next to Rey; like it was "illegal."

"So, is Jay looking after you?" he asked me; smiling at me.

"Haha, yeah, I guess he is. You and him are cousins, right?" I said.

"Yup, so you've hear. Let me guess…from Jay?"

"Yeah, you could say that, I guess. How's it going with you and Marie?" I asked, hoping it didn't make me sound like I like him, well, I did, but I didn't want him to know.

"Um, yeah…it's okay, but, I don't feel the love anymore, so I don't really know what to do…if I should break up with her or something, because, I don't want to break her heart, I mean, she's a very fragile person, but, I mean, if you didn't have feelings for that person anymore, what would be the point of still being with that person, right?" he said.

"Yeah. I guess, if I was in your position I would find it hard to decide too. You feel like if you break up with her it'll tear her heart out and she might be depressed and sad, but, again, if you don't feel the love or…something, you shouldn't be with them," I said, looking at the floor.

He just stared at me; smiling. Did I say something wrong? I think I did...

"Haha, your right. So, what do you think I should do?" he asked me; his eyes fixed on my face.

"Well, do what you think is best for you. In my opinion, I would let her down easy, explain my reason to her, without trying to hurt her feelings and yeah, that's basically it. But, you know, I'm a girl, we all have different expectations I guess," I said.

"Wow, okay then. Thanks, I'll think I'll try that," he said; smiling…still.

"Okay, cool," I replied back.

"So, how do you know all this about relationships? You have lots of experience or something?" he asked me.

"Nah, I actually don't have any. I don't date much unless I really like that person, so yeah. I just know all of this because I see what people are like with other people and you can always tell when they've lost the connection between them," I said. Haha, that made me sound smart.

"Oh, okay then. So, you've never had a boyfriend before or you've never been kissed?"

"Nop, never,"

"Oh…okay then. Say, a guy asks you out…soon, that I know, would you say yes?"

Was he asking me what I think he was asking me…? Was he asking me out?

"Um, depends…who's that guy?" I said. Oh my god! Am I flirting…ugh ==" I'm not the flirting type just to let you know, but…it's Rey.

"Well, let's just say…someone close to me, and hopefully is close to you too," he said, smiling.

"Oh, okay then. I might say yes, but, with your description, I'm not so sure. I might not even know the guy very well,"

"Okay then, I'll let him know what you said," he said.

. . .

Rey and I arrived in class just in time, everyone was already seated and there were two spots left…damn! They weren't next to each other. I sat in the front row, while Rey sat at the back…with his friends.

"See you later, I guess," he said, while passing by me.

"Yeah, you too," I replied back; smiling my idiotic smile.

The lesson was a total bore. I wasn't paying attention half of the time. My mind was really thinking about Rey and if he really was going to ask me out, I mean, who knows! Life is very unexpected these days.

I wonder what Jay was thinking about right now…wait! Jay? Wasn't I supposed to be thinking about Rey, unless…no! It can't be ==" I can't have a crush on Jay…can I? Well, I think it was a first reaction thing, seeing that I'm always with him, I guess, I'm just worried about him, it can't be a crush, it's too early, haha, I think…

"Tamayo, can you please answer the question," my teacher; Miss. Peterson.

I snapped out of my day dream and focused on Miss.

"Um, sorry Miss, I'm not quite sure what the answer is," I replied.

"Okay, please concentrate more Tamayo," she said, and then turned away to pick on another student to answer the question.

Man, she was so lame ==" she really needs to answer her on questions.

. . .

The bell had ringed for period 4 and I knew I would see Jay again. I got up from my seat and walked outside when a hand pulled me before I could walk out of the door.

…it was Rey.

"Hey, Tamayo. Um…can I talk to you at lunch today, or something?" he asked me; still holding my arm.

I would've said yes…if only, I didn't have that thing with Jay at the library.

"Oh, um…I'm sort of busy at lunch. Sorry, but, um tell me tomorrow. Yeah?" I replied back.

"Oh, okay then…that's cool. Yeah, sure, I'll tell you tomorrow. Um, actually, I'll tell you soon, I don't think your ready for something this big," he said; letting go of my arm and then walking away.

"Oh, okay. See ya,"

What was so big he couldn't tell me yet? It couldn't have been for a date, dates aren't really THAT big. Are they? I mean, I've never been on a date, I just thought it was one of those things that start you off with the person you like; sort of like…an introduction or something. Oh well…

. . .

I walked in the room, expecting everyone to be there, but, there was only Jay sitting down at the back row. When I had entered the room he looked up, smiled and waved me to sit next to him, so I walked up to him and sat at the seat next to him.

"Hey, how was period 3, did you know anyone there?" he asked me.

"Hello, yeah…period 3 was good. Um, yeah…I knew one person, but I didn't sit next to him because I was a bit late, so there were only two spots left; one in the front and one at the back, so yeah…I day dreamed," I said, smiling at him.

"OH, okay that's good. Who was the guy?"

"Um, Rey…your cousin,"

"Oh…that's…good. Did you guys talk about anything before or after class?" he asked; looking serious.

"Yeah, about quite a lot of things,"

"Oh, really…like…what?" he asked; still looking serious.

"Um, just about relationships and all that, nothing really big. He sort of asked me out,"

"WHAT! He did! Oh, yeah…that' good," he said; trying to sound cool with it.

"Oh, is that a bad thing?" I asked him; wondering why he looked so serious.

"Nop, not at all. It's just…something I was thinking and yeah,"

"Oh, okay then. Um, we still on for lunch today?"

"Yup, of course," he said; his face lighting up.

"Cool," I replied back.

"Um, just to be curious, but…did he tell you anything serious? Like…about weddings or something?" he asked; serious again.

What was up with all this serious business ==" Rey wanted to tell me something serious, and, I guess that Jay knew what it was. What the hell was it!

"Um, no…he said something about telling me something BIG, but I don't know what it is. He said it was too big for me to know, yet," I said; still confused and a little annoyed.

"Oh, okay then…good good,"

"Why, what's so big about it?" I asked.

"Um, I'm really not supposed to tell, really, Rey is supposed to, not me, so yeah, but I don't have something I have to tell you, personally," he said; looking straight into my eyes.

"Okay, what is it you need to tell me?" I said.

"Um, say…I like this girl, right? But, she likes someone else, what should I do?" he asked.

Was I like a relationship counsellor or something ==" first Jay then Rey and now Jay again…what are up with these two…

"Um, well…I guess, you should tell her, I mean, it wouldn't hurt. Are they together or something?" I said.

"No, their not, but they soon are going to be. I think their having an arranged marriage,"

"Oh, okay then. Do you…love her?" I asked.

"Um, well, I think I do. I've only known her for a while, but, I think I do love her. I mean, it's nothing like I've ever felt before," he answered.

"Oh, I see. Well, I think you should just express your feelings to her, before this other guys expresses it first, I guess,"

"Oh, okay then…thanks," he said.

"No problem," I replied back.

Nothing really exciting happened during period 4. Jay wasn't passing me notes…I guess that whole "conversation" that we had really got him thinking. I wonder who was that girl he was, supposedly, "in love with."

As usual, I payed no attention to class what-so-ever. I day dreamed…again and before I knew it, the bell ringed for lunch time.


	6. Lunch time

I grabbed my books for the last two periods, and, of course, my lunch and headed to the library where Jay was waiting for me…

On the way; I saw Anne talking to a couple of people; mostly boys ==" she's such a player…and she's a girl. Aren't guys supposed to be players, not girls! Oh well, what can you do about it.

I walked up to her to talk to her a bit.

"Hello Anne, how are you? Looks like your busy doesn't it," I said; smirking.

"Oh, hey Tamayo. I'm great, and yes, as you can see I am very busy. How's it going with you and Jay aye?" she asked me; smiling.

"What on earth are you talking about Anne, I don't have feelings for Jay," I replied back.

"Sure you don't Tamayo, sure you don't. If you don't I'm pretty sure you will, very very soon," she said; smirking.

"I've only known him for a day!" I said.

"Yeah, but that's how short you can fall in love with someone,"

"Okay then. I've gotta go meet up with Jay,"

"Haha, see, it's already happening, just very slowly," she said; still grinning.

"Yeah yeah, I still don't believe of falling in love in one day," I said; grinning back, well, trying to grin anyways.

"Okay then, whatever you say. Cya laters have fun," she said; winking at me.

"Yeah, I'll try. See you," I replied back; walking away.

. . .

I arrived at the library; seeing Jay sitting on the seats near it, eating his lunch.

"Hey, Jay. Sorry I'm late; I saw Anne and talked to her a bit, so yeah. Hope you weren't here for long," I said.

"Hello. Oh, that's fine. I was just eating my lunch, I'm a pretty slow eater," he replied back; smiling at me.

"Oh, okay then. That's good. Um, we can go inside after I eat," I said.

"Haha, yeah…sure," he replied back.

We ate our lunches together in silence. I guess, we didn't really know what to say to each other. When we had finished eating our lunch we both got up and went inside the library. We looked for a desk to sit at and some books for studying.

"Um, I think this will be a good book to understand algebra better," Jay said; holding out a book. It was really thick ==" Joy.

"Oh, okay then. Thank you," I said; taking the book from him.

"Um, so…do you want to go back to the desk, so I can explain how it works to you?" he said.

"Yeah, sure," I said.

It felt so…awkward. Why? I mean, it was fine before, what was so different now? Was Anne right…was I falling for him…in a day…?

. . .

"Haha, thanks Jay. I actually get it now, you should be a teacher one day," I said; smiling at him.

I still didn't know how I felt about him, maybe give it a week. We'll see then how I feel.

"Nah, it's fine," he said; smiling.

"Um, anyways, what do you want to do now?" I asked him.

"Er, not sure, want to just talk in the library?" he answered.

"Yeah, sure," I said.

"Um, so…what do you want to talk about?" he asked me.

"Um, anything really, I don't mind," I answered.

"Oh, okay then…" he said.

We didn't talk for what felt like an hour, so I broke the silence.

"So, um…who's this crush of yours?" I asked.

"Um, well…I can't say, because, firstly, I'm not allowed to be with "her," because of that stupid arranged marriage and secondly, I don't think she loves me back, seeing that she's probably in love with this other guy," he said; sadly.

"Um, okay then...well, I think, I too am starting to fall for someone I've only known for a while, so it's really complicated and everything, but, I'm going to wait for at least a week until I really know how I feel about him, so, I guess, you should do that to," I said; trying to making him happy.

"Oh, okay then, cool, so, the plan is to wait for a week until we know how we really feel about that person and if we still love that person will confess it to them?" he asked.

"Yup, that's the plan," I answered.

"Oh, okay, cool. Thanks heaps Tamayo, I know I could always count on you,"

I hope I wasn't blushing. Argh! I think I was falling for Jay, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. First Rey, now Jay…what is up with my taste of guys! First, their both extremely cute or hot, and, secondly, they're cousins! I think I'm falling for people in their family ==" you might never know, I might go for Rey's brother =="

The bell ringed for period five, before I could say anything else to Jay.


	7. Adate?

Jay and I walked into class, and, surprise, surprise, Rey was in there too and he didn't have any of his friends, perfect ==" I was stuck with the two guys I might be in love with. What was this subject again? Oh, right, its pdhpe…another score ==" it's where we learn all about "things" in our society these days; I'm not going to go into detail, but yeah.

Anyways, Rey looked up from his desk and forwarded Jay and I to sit next to him; me being in the middle.

"Hey, guys. Sit with me, yeah? I got no one else in here that I know," Rey said; talking to both Jay and I.

"Yeah, sure," I replied back.

I looked at Jay and all he did was look away from the table and faced the front. What was up with him today? It's like he didn't like Rey for some reason…

"So, Tamayo, how have you been? Haven't seen you since period three, or four? Well, either one, haha," Rey asked me; smiling goofily.

"Yeah, I'm alright. I've just been hanging out with Rey, he's a really nice guy, you?" I answered.

"Yeah, I'm good. I took your advice about the whole slowly breaking up thing; I think it's working,"

"That's good,"

Our teacher walked in and the lesson had started, this time, Jay was passing me notes during the "discussion" we were having.

_Jay: Hello there. _

_Tamayo: Hey._

_Jay: You bored?_

_Tamayo: OF COURSE! =="_

_Jay: Haha, me too. _

_Tamayo: LOL! Nice…_

_Jay: Yeah…anyways, um, wanna walk home together or something?_

_Tamayo: Yeah, sure. If you want to._

_Jay: I want to._

_Tamayo: Okay, cool. Then we'll walk together _

_Jay: Cool._

_Tamayo: Haha, yeah. Doing anything exciting tonight?_

_Jay: Nop, not really. Unless you count staying up all night doing homework and chatting to random people, fun, then yeah._

_Tamayo: Haha, maybe, only the chatting to random people part :L_

_Jay: Haha, yeah…maybe. _

_Tamayo: Anyways…what now?_

_Jay: Haha, well, it looks like Rey keeps looking at you. I do think he likes you =="_

I looked up on Rey and when our eyes met each other he looked away; facing the board.

_Tamayo: Haha, yeah, he was, but, it doesn't mean that he likes me. Would it be so bad if he did?_

_Jay: No, it wouldn't, but, that would just mean more competition for him, cause I know a guy that likes you too Tamayo. _

_Tamayo: Oh, really…who?_

_Jay: Can't say, you'll have to find out…_

_Tamayo: Oh, okay then…that's a shame, I would have really like to known who it was, but, I guess, I can't do anything about it._

_Jay: Haha, yeah. I guess you can't xD_

_Tamayo: Well, anyways, I won't tell you the person that likes you then :P_

_Jay: Oh, someone likes me now then…_

_Tamayo: Yup, that's for sure._

Wait a moment, that person was me…right? Did I really like him or was it one of the instinct feelings that when one of your crushes cousins come you think your attracted to them.

Wait, here I go again, thinking about this so hardly. I guess, it comes down to if I really like him by a week I'll tell him and if I don't, I won't bother.

_Jay: Who?_

_Tamayo: Like I said, if you don't tell me who likes me then I can't tell you who likes you _

_Jay: Okay then, fairs fair I guess._

_Tamayo: Yup, fairs fair. _

_Jay: Um, maybe you should talk to Rey for a bit, he looks a bit…lonely._

_Tamayo: Oh, okay then…if you want me too._

_Jay: Well, I don't really want you too, but, since you like the guy you might as well just talk to him instead. _

_Tamayo: Well, I like you too._

OMG! Whoops, I wasn't supposed to say that! :O I had to think of something…fast.

_Jay: Wait, what? You like me too?_

_Tamayo: Um, as a friend…I like you…as a friend._

_Jay: Oh, right, haha. _

_Tamayo: Haha, yeah. _

I stopped passing notes to Jay…for now and turned to face Rey and passed him a note.

_Tamayo: Hello, you looked lonely, so I was going to talk to you _

_Rey: Hey there, yeah…I felt a bit lonely. _

_Tamayo: Haha, sorry about that. Just discussing some things with Jay._

_Rey: Yeah, I saw that. You two seem to be getting closer to every hour, haha. I'm pretty jealous he's always near you._

_Tamayo: Oh, really? Well, maybe, if you hanged out with us more you wouldn't be._

_Rey: Yeah, I guess I could _

_Tamayo: That sounds pretty good._

_Rey: Yup_

_Tamayo: I have lots of guys after me these days, it's pretty weird ==" _

_Rey: Oh, really…who?_

_Tamayo: Um, well, Jay said he had a friend that sort of liked me, and I think someone you know likes me._

_Rey: What makes you think that?_

_Tamayo: Well, because about that conversation we had before, about the whole asking out thing._

_Rey: Haha, no, I meant…how do you know its someone I know, I mean, it could be me, right?_

_Tamayo: Wait, are you…serious? _

_Rey: Only if you want me to be…_

_Tamayo: Wait, so you're actually asking me out?_

_Rey: Yup, sounds like it…I mean, you don't have to accept if you don't want to or anything. _

_Tamayo: Oh, wow, okay then. Um, just give me a second. I need to talk to Jay. _

_Rey: Sure._

Whoa! Okay then, so…he asked me out. The cutest boy in school asked me out, but, why did I feel like I needed to ask Jay about this to make sure it was fine with him…? Maybe cause he was his cousin? I don't know…

_Tamayo: JAY JAY JAY! Rey just asked me out…_

_Jay: Wow, oh, okay then…um, cool. _

_Tamayo: Is that cool with you?_

_Jay: Of course it's cool with me, why wouldn't it be cool with me…_

_Tamayo: Oh, I don't know…it was just a feeling I had._

_Jay: Um, actually…I need to tell you something, soon, okay?_

_Tamayo: Course, sure, you can tell me anything _

The intercom above us had gone on and someone was speaking through it, most likely our principle.

"Ahem, Tamayo, can you please come to the office quickly, please, Tamayo, please come to the office. Thank you."

Wait, what? Why did the office need me?

"You better go Tamayo," my teacher said.

I stood up and said bye to the guys and walked out of the classroom, slowly walking to the principal's office. Was I in trouble or something? I don't remember doing anything wrong…

. . .

The principal was waiting outside of his door and when he had seen me he rushed to me.

"Tamayo, we have to go to the hospital immediately, your mother had just had a heart attack,"


	8. No, I LOVE YOU

**(Please comment on my story, how can I improve and what you liked about it **** thanks) **

WHAT…my…mum…had…a…heart attack?

But…but…she's the healthiest person I know. How could she…get…a heart attack?

"What…my mum's in the hospital, but, how-"I said, before our principal interrupted me.

"There's no time to explain, we have to get to the hospital immediately," he told me.

I couldn't do anything else but follow him into his car and go to the hospital. I didn't know what to do or say; I just sat there…in the car, staring at absolutely nothing. I didn't know if my eyes were closed or if I was looking outside my window; I just sat there…empty. I didn't even realise when we had arrive at the hospital until our principal called my name.

"Tamayo, were here,"

I looked at him.

"Oh, okay then. Um, I'll meet you inside, I just need a little while," I said.

"Yeah, sure. I'll meet you inside,"

"Sure," I said, before he walked out of his car and into the hospital.

What was I supposed to do? I mean, I knew that if I went in there I'd start crying, but, if I didn't I'd regret it. I guess, in the end, what matters most is being with my mum.

I got out from the car and walked slowly to the hospital; I didn't know what was going around me…I was staring at the floor, blankly.

. . .

When I walked into the hospital the Principal walked up to me and grabbed my arm.

"This was, please Tamayo," he told me with a pitied expression.

I just nodded my head and followed the Principal (you may be wondering why I keep calling him "The Principal" and that's because throughout my whole high school life, I've never known his name, stupid, I know ==")

Anyways, the Principal and I stood in front of a door with the number 16 on it; I was guessing that behind this door was my mum. I didn't know what to expect, how I would react or what she would look like when I opened the door.

I didn't know what to do. I just…stood there.

"You can go in, if you want Tamayo, but you don't have to. No pressure," the Principal told me.

"Yes, thank you sir," I said; smiling at him before opening the door and looking inside the room.

She was there; my mum. She was lying down on her bed; sleeping. I walked up to her bed and looked at her. I touched her hand; holding it into mine. She reacted to my touch by opening her eyes and smiling at me.

"Hey Sweety. You came," she told me; smiling.

"Hey mum. Yeah, I just found out about this today, so yeah," I replied back.

"How are you feeling sweety?" she asked me.

"I'm fine, are you okay? How did this even happen?" I said; looking serious and concerned.

"Yes, sweety, I'm fine. Well, I guess it's just all the over work time I've been doing lately. We really need the money," she said.

"Oh, mum, if I had known I would have taken a part time job," I said.

"No, that's fine. Don't pressure yourself sweety. You have a lot of things coming up soon anyways,"

What was she talking about? What "things," I guess I'd have to ask her that later when she got better.

"Has Rey talken to you yet?" she asked me.

"Um, well, yeah. He talked to me, but about him and me going out some time. Why?" I said; confused.

"Oh, okay then. That's good sweety. Listen, go out with him okay? I know you like him so I chose him for you. Well, I think I'm going to get some rest now. Good night sweety," she said; before she closed her eyes and nodded of too sleep.

What did she mean when she said "I know you like him so I chose him for you," I really didn't know what she was talking about.

. . .

By the time I arrived at school, classes had ended and everyone was at their locker. I got out of the car and saw Jay standing near the front gates; I walked up to him.

"Hey, Jay. How long have you been here for?" I asked him.

"Hello. Um, not long. I was just waiting for you," he said; smiling at me.

"Oh, you didn't have to do that. Um, I'll just grab my things and we can go," I said.

"Sure,"

I ran to my locker and grabbed my stuff; running back to where Jay was standing. I was puffed out.

"Hey Jay. Let's go," I said; breathing heavily.

"Okay then, cool," he said; smiling.

We walked off and started talking to each other.

"So where did you go in period 5?" Jay asked me.

"Um, I went to the hospital. Mum had a heart attack," I said.

"Oh, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to bring that up. Is she okay?" he said.

"Nah, it's alright. Yeah, she's fine,"

"So, you going to be with your dad all night?" he asked me.

"Nope, he walked away from out family when I was younger,"

"Oh, oh, I'm really sorry. I keep bringing up depressing conversations, really sorry," he said; with a sorry expression.

"It's alright; it's not your fault anyways,"

"You sure?"

"Yeah, of course," I told him.

"Okay, that's good. So, does that mean you going to be home alone?" he asked me.

"Yup, looks like it," I answered him.

"Um, well, if you want…I can stay with you for a while. I mean, only if you want me to," he said; scratching his head.

"Um, yeah…sire. That would be nice," I said; smiling at him.

God, he was gorgeous. Whoa! Where did that come from. Wait, why was my heart beating really fast?

OMG! I was falling in love with Jay! NOOOO, how could this happen. Just when Rey asks me out, I fall in love with Jay ==" my love life is complicated.

. . .

We stepped in front of my house. It was weird having a guy around the house, but, hey, it was better than nothing.

We walked into my house…

"Well, this is my home," I said; turning to face him.

"Wow, it's nice," he said; smiling at me.

"Um, so what exactly do you want to do?" I asked him.

"Um, anything,"

"Oh, um, let's go to the living room."

"Sure, he said; following me into the living room.

We sat down on the couch. It was so awkward. I've never felt like this before, not even with Rey! And I've only known Jay for a day.

"Um, so…what do you want to talk about?" Jay asked me; breaking the silence.

"Um, how's it going with you and your crush?" I asked, not knowing what else to talk about.

"I…think…I love her," he said.

"Oh, do you now? If you do, I think you should tell her," I told him.

"Yeah, okay…I will,"

"Oh, like…right now? Are we going to her house or something?" I asked.

"Nop, no need. We're already here," he said.

"Wait, what-"

He pressed his lips against mine before I could finish what I was about to say. Wow, my first kiss…I never expected it to be with Jay until this very day I met him. It was…unbelievable, hard to describe…I didn't want it to end, but, he broke it off after a while.

"Wow, okay then. Um, so…you like me?" I asked.

"No, Tamayo…"

Damn! So close.

"I love you,"


	9. A couple

He…loved me.

"Oh, well, um, okay then. That's cool," I said.

"I'm sorry, I mean, I didn't mean to! I knew you liked Rey and everything and I still did it," he said; his sorry expression on again.

"Look, its fine. Its how you feel and to be honest…I was falling in love with you too," I said; hoping that would cheer him up.

"Oh, so that was me you were talking about," he said.

"Yeah, it was."

"Um, so, are you still going to go out with Rey, right?" he asked me.

"Oh, well, not if you don't want me tom" I told him.

"Look, its fine. I don't mind, I mean, if you want to, you can. I just needed to express my feelings towards you,"

"Um, I'll call it off," I said.

"You know, you don't have to," he said.

"No, I want to,"

"Okay, if you sure," he said.

"Yeah, I'm sure," I said back.

"I can stay the whole night if you want (don't get the wrong idea," he told me.

"Yeah, I'd like that, as long as it's fine with your parents," I said.

"Okay, cool. I'll just give them a call now. Excuse me," he said; grabbing his phone and then walking out the door.

As soon as he walked out I squealed and collapsed on the couch. Wow, I did love him.

He came back into the house and sat down next to me; putting his phone down onto the table.

"I can stay tonight, but, I have to drop by tomorrow morning to have a shower and change clothes. You can come if you want," he said.

YAY! He was staying over night. I've never had a guy sleep over before.

"So, what do you want to do tonight?" he asked me.

"Um, we can watch movies all night until we pass out," I answered.

"Yeah, sure. That sounds fun," je replied.

"Okay, cool…pick one," I said; holding out a couple of DVD's in front of him.

"Um, we can watch Rush Hour?" he said.

"Yeah, sure," I said.

I put in the DVD and started it. As soon as it was playing I sat next to Jay on the couch; placing my hands on the side.

I was really into the movie until Jay placed his hand into mine so we were holding hands…like a couple. I looked down at our hands and then looked up at his face. He looked at me too and slowly moved closer to my face until he lightly pressed his lips against mine.

"Um, I hope you feel the same way for me as I do for you," Jay said.

"I do, maybe even more than you do," I replied back.

We turned back to watch the rest of the movie.


	10. Breakfast Time!

After two movies Jay was asleep, so I turned off the TV and slept on the couch next to his.

I had the bestest dream ever…

_I was in a meadow filled with flowers and in front of me was an opening, standing there was Jay; so…perfect. I ran to him as he ran to me and we hugged and stood there…forever. I just couldn't let him go. _

I woke up with sores all over my body. I'm never sleeping on a couch ever again.

When I looked up to see where Jay was sleeping he wasn't there so I jumped out of the couch and was wondering if that night with Jay was a dream.

Then, I heard some cooking coming from the kitchen. Was Mum back home? I looked in to find Jay standing in front of the oven cooking what smelt like…pancakes.

"Oh, good morning. Hope you don't mind, I used some of your things to make pancakes," he said; smiling.

"Morning. No, its fine," I said; stretching my sores away and sniffing the air. The pancakes actually smelt nice.

I sat down on the kitchen bench top and watched him make/cook the pancakes. He was very talented.

"Anyways, when we going to you house?" I asked Jay.

"Um, soon. After we eat breakfast and clean the dishes," he answered.

"Oh, okay then, cool. I'll just get dressed and all that while your cooking," I said; while getting of the kitchen bench top.

"Yeah, sure," he said; before I reached the stairs.

. . .

I got out of the shower feeling nice and refresh. I got dressed into some warm clothes; seeing that it was windy outside and went downstairs for breakfast. He had it all done; the pancakes, the table and he even cleaned the dishes he used to cook. Now, he was pouring juice for both of us.

"Wow, looks and smells really good," I said.

"That's good. I hoped that you would like it," he replied.

"Well, I do,"

We both sat down on the table and started eating. It was pretty quiet with just the two of us in the house…eating…food.

"Um, so. We have History in first period. Rey's in your class, right?" Jay asked.

I knew where he was going with this.

"Yeah, he is. I'll tell him then that I'm calling it off," I answered.

"Oh, okay. Again, you don't have tom"

"No, I want to. I'm with YOU now aren't I?"

"Yeah, I guess you are," he said; smiling.

"Um, I'm done eating. I'll just tooth brush and we can go," I said; getting up.

"Yeah, sure. I'll wash up here," he said; getting up too.

"No, it's fine. I'll clean the dishes,"

"No, really. It's the least I can do after staying over night," he said.

"Jay…you stayed over for me, not cause you wanted to,"

"How do you know I didn't want to," he asked.

"I don't know," I answered.

"Just go up and tooth brush. I'm cleaning up," he said; grabbing the dishes and placing them into the sink.

"Yeah, sure," I said; climbing up the stairs.

I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth. By the time I had finished, Jay was sitting on the couch, waiting for me.

"Hey, you read to go now?" Jay asked me.

"Yup, I sure am," I answered.

"Okay, cool," he said; getting up from the couch and walking out the door with me.

We were off to Jay's house. My neighbourhood was a very quiet one, so you never heard anything besides dogs barking and the wind brushing the trees making the trees rustle, haha. Some people could say it was spooky, but, to me, I found it very peaceful.

We walking on the path; scattered leaves everywhere. We didn't talk very much, plus, it didn't take very long to get to Jay's house…probably a five minute walk.

. . .

We arrived at his house not long after going out of mine. We stopped at the front of his door.

"Well, here it goes," Jay said; smiling at me.

We went into his house…


	11. Dreams 3

…it was so beautiful in his house. Everything was so clean and neat…and organised! I never expected Jay's house to look like this.

"I'm just going to have a shower and change clothes and we can go, unless you want to stay here for a bit," he said.

"Yeah, sure. We can stay here for a while," I said; smiling at him.

"Alright, cool," he replied; climbing up the stairs.

I sat down on his couch and waited for him to finish having a shower and dressing up. I thought about everything that has happened so far. First, Jay comes to school. Second, Rey starts talking to me just after I become friends with Jay. Third, Rey sort of asks me out. Fourth, both Rey and Jay ask me about relationships concerning me. Fifth, my mum goes to the hospital. Sixth, Jay stays over night and he kisses me. Seventh, he and I are now together. Eighth, I'm going to call of the date with Rey and ninth, I'm in love with Jay.

. . .

Jay came downstairs; buttoning up his shirt as he walked the last two steps. He approached me; smiling and then sat down next to me on the couch.

"So, how did you sleep?" he asked me.

"Good, it was really…relaxing," I answered.

"You dreamt about me didn't you?" he said.

How did he know that…

"Haha, no. What are you on about?" I replied back.

"Don't lie, I heard you call my name when you were asleep," he said; smirking.

"Okay, fine, you got me. I dreamt about you," I said.

"Was it a good dream?"

"You could say it was,"

"Want to tell me about it?" he said.

"Haha, no thanks," I answered.

"I'll tell you about my dream," he said.

"Okay, but you have to go first," I said back.

"Alright, fine. It was about you and you were with…Rey; as in together and um, you were getting…married, so, on your wedding day I came into your room you were in and gave you a note. When you were already at the altar you forgot to read it, so you read it then and I walked off; hoping you would follow me," he said.

"Oh, what happened at the end? What did the note say?" I asked.

"I don't know what happened at the end. The note…? I guess you'll have to find out later," he said; grinning.

I was about to ask what he meant when he said 'I guess you'll have to find out later,' but, before I could he grabbed me hand and held it against mine. He looked at me and smiled. I was guessing that I was blushing.

"Um, so-"

He lightly kissed me on the cheek…he had to stop kissing me before I could finish my sentences. I was blushing even more now. =="

"Um, so, was your dream a good dream or nightmare?" I asked.

"A nightmare of course, you were with someone else and not me, so of course it had to be a nightmare," he answered.

"Oh, okay then," I replied back.

"So, what was your dream about?" he asked me.

"Um, well, mine was pretty boring, but, to me it was really comforting and special,"

"Cute," he said.

"Well, anyways, I was in a meadow filled with flowers and in front of me was an opening and you were standing there so perfect. I ran up to you as your ran up to me and we hugged…forever. I just couldn't seem to let you go, I don't know why," I said; blushing…again.

He pulled me closer and hugged me.

"Thank you Tamayo for loving me so much," Jay said; smiling and still hugging me.

I could have stayed like that forever.

"No, Jay. Thank you for making me love you," I said back.

I pulled away from the hug and looked at him in the eyes; his hazelnut eyes. He looked straight at me too. I pressed my lips against his passionately, that's right…I did love him, a lot.


	12. Lost

We arrived at school; still holding hands. I looked around and saw Anne, looking and gawping at us. I quickly dropped Jay's hand as she was approaching us.

"OMG! Are you two together? So much for 'I don't fall in love with guys in a day'," she said; grinning at me.

"Wait-"

"Yes, we are together," Jay said; interrupting me and grabbing my hand again. He lightly kissed it. Was him kissing me the only way to shut me up =="

"Ugh…yeah," I said; blushing…again.

"Ngaw, you guys looks so cute together," she said.

"Yeah…" I said.

"Well, I better get going now. See you guys laters, have fun," she said; before winking at me.

"Bye," Jay and I said together.

We walked off holding hands again…

"Tamayo, you don't have to be ashamed to be with me," Jay told me.

"Jay, you know I'm not, it's just…it was Anne. She was always the prettier than me and got all the guy and now I have you…I just didn't want her to feel like she didn't matter to me anymore," I said.

"Well, she didn't look sad about 'us.' She actually looked pretty happy for you," he replied.

"Yeah, I know that now," I said.

We headed for our lockers and grabbed our books. I still knew that I had to tell Rey that I was calling the date off, but, the problem was, I didn't know how to tell him.

After we had finished we walked to homeroom. What was weird though was that a couple of girls came up to Jay.

"Jay, please come with me to the formal," the one with the pig tails said.

Before he could say anything the one with the blue eyes said:

"No, please go with me,"

Lastly; the one with glasses said:

"Please, go with me Kuya*," *Kuya= another word you call your older brother, someone who is older than you by a couple of years, or an older cousin.

Then he was able to talk…

"I'm sorry ladies, but I already have someone to go with me," he said; holding up his and my hands joined together.

"Oh, it's okay," they all said together; then they walked off looking disappointed.

I turned to face him…

"Wow, it's only the second day back and already, they're thinking about whom to go with for the formal. Word must have spread out that you were hot, haha, and what makes you think I'm going with you?" I asked Jay; only as a joke, I don't think he see it that way though.

"Oh, if you don't what to you could've told me, I mean-"

"Jay, I was only joking. Calm down, of course I'll go with you," I said; interrupting him.

"Oh, that's good then," he said, smiling again

. . .

We walked into homeroom and sat down at our desks at the back row of the class. No one else was in class yet.

"When is our formal anyways?" Jay asked me.

"Um, close to the end of the year, I think. Either that or just after we finish school, which is in term 3," I answered.

"Oh, okay. Can we get the invitations now?"

"Jay…it's only the second day back,"

"I know, but, still,"

"Alright, fine. You can get them at the office, but you have to put your name down and the person your going with, and you have to also pay $90 for the invitation," I said.

"Oh, okay then. Let's go at lunch then, yeah? I'll pay for you too," he said; smiling.

"Oh, no…it's fine. I don't want you to pay for me," I said.

"I want to,"

"Alright then, if you really want to, but, once you pay and put down our names you can't back down." I said; warning him.

"I know,"

"Alright then, if you say so," I said, dropping the conversation.

. . .

Homeroom felt very short that by the time Jay and I had stopped talking the bell had ringed for period one.

Jay and I went our separate ways and I was more than ready to face Rey. Again, I met him while walking to class and we walked together.

"Hey, listen, about the date-"

"Rey, I can't go. Um, I'm going out with Jay. I'm really sorry," I said; interrupting him.

"Oh, that's fine. We can just be friends then, yeah? Um, listen, I need to tell you something…supposedly next week, so spend your time wisely with Jay. See you," he said; while walking into class and sitting next to his friends.

What! Why would I need to spend my time wisely with Jay…?

The lesson was so boring that I wasn't listening half of the time; I was thinking about Rey and what he had said to me just a moment ago.

. . .

I walked into my period2 class, still confused. I saw Jay already sitting on his seat so I came to join him.

"Hello," he said; happily.

"Hey," I said.

I must have looked pretty serious because of what he had said next.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm just thinking,"

"Well, it must be something bad. Your face says it all,"

"No, it's fine…really," I said; looking up and smiling at him.

"Alright then," he replied.

Nothing fun had happened during that lesson, just the same boring things…either thinking, not paying attention, passing notes to Jay or actually listening to what the teacher had to say. The same went for every single lesson, so let's just skip to lunch, shall we

. . .

Jay and I walked to the office for the formal invitations. When we had entered Jay went up to the office ladies…me following behind him.

"Hello, do you have any invitations for the year 12 formal?" he asked the lady behind the counter.

"Yup, I sure do," the office lady replied.

"Cool, can I please have two?"

"Yup, sure. That's $180 all together. Can you also write your name and your partner's name on this paper," she said; handing a piece of paper to him

On it, it said:

**Year 12 Formal Partners **

Jay Llamoso; Tamayo Rosario.

He gave the paper back to the Office Lady and then handed me the invitation while walking out.

"Here ya go; keep it safe," he said.

"Yeah, sure will," I said; smiling.

"When does your mum come home?" Jay asked me.

"Um, tomorrow, I think," I answered.

"Oh, okay then. Want me to stay over night again?"

"If, you want to, but, this time we are not sleeping on the couches,"

"Yeah, sure. So, where do we sleep?" he asked.

"My room," I answered.

"On the same bed?"

I nodded.

"Well, you don't have to, I mean, there is a folding bed in my room, so you can use that if you want…well, if it's too weird to sleep on the same bed as me," I said.

"Oh, okay then. I think I'll just sleep on the same bed as you, folding beds are too much hassle," he replied back.

"Alright, cool,"

We headed over to the library and stayed there until lunch finished.

"So, what are we going to do at your house tonight?" Jay asked me.

"Um, anything you want," I answered.

"Oh, okay then. We can just stay up all night and talk?" he suggested.

"Yeah, sure. I'd like that," I said; smiling at him.

"Alright, cool, so what do you want to do now?" he asked.

"Um, nothing. Let's just go to sleep or something,"

"Um, Tamayo," he said; coming closer to me, until our hands touched.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Um, I just want to let you know that no matter what I will always love you, even if something happens in the future and you choose to be with someone else, okay? I love you," he said; lightly kissing me again, I kissed him back.

"Mm, thanks Jay, but, why are you telling me this?" I asked.

"You'll find out sooner enough," I replied.

I didn't have the patience to ask him what he meant, so I just dropped the conversation…for now.

. . .

The rest of the day was pretty boring, time went by really slowly and the only thing I had on my mind was what Jay and Rey had said…it bothered me, a lot. I knew something was going to happen soon, I figured that much out from Rey and Jay, but the question was…what? What was going to happen that was going to change the relationship I have between Jay and Rey? Why did I have to spend my time wisely with Jay? What did I have to choose, who did I have to choose from?

I was so lost…


	13. I'll always be here for you

Jay and I were heading home; walking through the wind. We were holding hands, again it made me happier and got my mind off things for a while, so that was good, I guess.

"Hey, can we head to my house first, so I can have a shower and bring clothes, so I don't have to go back there tomorrow morning?" Jay asked me.

"Yeah, of course we can," I answered.

We passed my house and walked straight to Jay's house; still holding hands. It was warmer that way, and, well…better hehe. When we had arrived the wind grew bigger and everything was flying away…even my hair.

Jay and I quickly ran inside his house and sat on the couch, puffed out and warmer from running. After a while Jay got up and started walking to the stairs.

"I'll just have a quick shower, grab some things and then we can go, okay?" he asked; smiling at me.

"Yup, sounds good," I said.

He walked up while I was still sitting on his couch. I lied down and closed my eyes for a bit, and before I knew it I was dreaming…

_It was all white around me, to my left was Jay; standing and smiling at me, to my right was Rey also smiling at me and right in front of me was my mum; pointing at Rey. _

"_Honey, pick Rey, he will make you more happier," she told me._

_What was going on? Why did I have to pick._

"_Why? Why do I have to pick?" I asked her._

"_Because, that is the person you are going to be with forever," she said; smiling._

"_I'm sorry, mum, but I love Jay more,"_

_I walked closer to Jay, but, all it seemed to do was to make him go further away from me, while Rey was coming closer._

"_No…JAY!" I said, screaming. _

I woke up, sweating and Jay was sitting next to me; holding my hand…I was startled to see him there.

"How long have I been asleep for?" I asked him.

"Just an hour. Are you okay?" he asked me.

"Yeah, fine, I just had a…nightmare, I guess," I said.

"Was I a monster or something? Cause you were screaming my name…again," he said.

"No, not at all, it was just…nothing, don't worry,"

We both go up; him holding my hand seeing that I was still unstable and we both walked out of the door into the windy street.

. . .

We arrived at my house; freezing cold. We sat in front of the couch and put the heater on. Jay placed his things in my bedroom while I was setting it up.

When we had both finished we just sat there, in the warmth. I then laid my head on his lap and watch the fly that was flying right in front of me. I would have killed it, but I was too comfortable.

"So, what was your dream about?" Jay asked me.

"You don't want to know," I answered.

"Of course I do. If it was a nightmare I'd want to help you get rid of it,"

"Oh, okay then. Well, it was all bright and everything was white. I saw you on my left, Rey on my right and my mum in front of me. She was pointing out Rey telling me to pick him, because I'd be more happier, and I asked her why I had to and she said because that's the person I was going to be with forever, but, I told her that I loved you more and so I walked closer to you, but you seemed to be moving further away from me while Rey was moving closer, then I woke up," I said.

"Oh, wow. Well, if this ever happens, I just want you to know to go with the person you love the most, yeah? We might never know what happens in the future, you might love someone else more and "we" might be over, but who knows really," he said; lifting up my hand and placing it against his.

"But, that's the problem Jay, I don't want anything to change, I want to be like this, in this exact moment forever. I know that may sound weird, but-"

"No, it's not weird…not at all. I want to stay like this forever too," he said.

"Okay, thanks,"

"You're welcome,"

We stayed the way we were for a couple more minutes until I got up from my position and just sat next to him.

"So, do you want to have dinner or something?" I asked him.

"Yeah, sure, that would be nice. What are we having?" he asked.

I got up and went to the kitchen, looking for something we could eat…that I could cook.

"Um, well, sandwiches sounds pretty good at the moment, so yeah," I told him.

"Hm, sounds good. Want me to help you with making them?" he asked.

"No, its fine, I think I can make sandwiches by myself," I replied; smiling at him.

I toasted the bread, spread butter on it and put on the ham and cheese on it. Then, I carried it out to the living room where Jay was waiting for me.

"Here you go," I said; giving him the plate with the sandwich and taking a seat next to him.

We both started eating our sandwiches silently and peacefully. Jay was the first to finish his sandwich, while I was still only half way through it.

"You eat fast Jay," I said.

"Yeah, I know," he said back.

When I had finally finished eating my sandwich, I grabbed my plate and his plate and started washing it in the sink. Jay got up and approached me.

"Mind if I help," he said; grabbing the sponge from my hand and started scrubbing the plated.

"Um, yeah, sure. Thanks," I said.

"Okay, cool. You wash, I scrub, deal?"

"Yup, deal," I said; smiling at him.

It didn't take as long until we finished cleaning and stacking the dishes. It seemed effortless with Jay around to help me. We then sat on the couches again and warmed up in front of the heater.

"Um, I'm going to have a shower now, so I'll be a while. Will you be okay?" I asked Jay.

"Yup, I'll be fine, haha," he answered.

"Okay then, cool," I said; running up the stairs and into my bedroom.

I grabbed my pyjamas, underwear…everything I'd need and then headed to the bathroom.

. . .

I walked downstairs wearing my monkey pyjamas and sat next to Jay who was smiling; I think he was making fun of my pyjamas =="

"What's so funny?" I asked him.

"Um, nothing, I just like your pj's," he said; giggling.

"Oh, shh, I know they're weird,"

"Haha, no there not, they look cute on you," he said; winking at me. I blushed…

"Oh, thanks," I replied.

He came closer to me and hugged me, deep into his arms and sighed.

"I want to remember this exact moment forever; you in your cute pyjamas and me hugging the one person I've ever and I'm ever going to fall in love with," he said. I don't know what he said that made me cry, but I was…

Jay let go of the hug and looked at me; worry in his face.

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?" he asked me.

"I don't know, I guess, it's because I feel like this is going to end very soon, I'm not sure how or why, but, I just feel like its going to happen, and I know I don't want it to," I said; holding onto him and still crying.

"Look, it's going to be fine, I'll be here for you no matter what happens, even if we won't be like this soon, I will always be here for you…ALWAYS!" he said; holding me too.


	14. The truth comes out!

"Thank you," I told Jay; looking up at him, trying to smile.

"It's okay," he told me; kissing my forehead lightly.

. . .

I got up from the couch and went up to my bedroom; Jay following behind me. We both, then, collapsed onto my bed falling asleep. Before I knew it, I was dreaming…again.

_It was the same white room I was in, in my last dream…but, this time, my mum had collapsed and Rey was with her, helping her up. I was with Jay, standing next to him, watching my mum collapse. I tried to walk to her, but I couldn't, I just couldn't seem to get to her. Was it because I was with Jay? _

_No, it couldn't be, could it? Would my mum really collapse because I chose Jay over Rey, I mean, what was the big deal? Why was I going to spend the rest of my life with them…forever? _

I woke up in the middle of the night. I looked at Jay who looked like he was having a nightmare too. I didn't know what it was about, but it was something bad.

"She only chose you because she's concerned for her mum, not because she loves you. Get that into your head Rey!" he said, screaming out loud and probably in his dream too.

"It may be true that she may not have the same feelings for me as she used to, but, I still do and that's a good enough of a reason for me to fight for her. For now, I will stand back, but, one day, I will get her back, you'll see," he said out loud again; in a softer tone.

He then woke up; startled. He stared at me for a long moment, I think he was trying to encounter what had just happened, but couldn't quite do it.

"What happened?" he asked; still startled.

"You were just having a nightmare," I answered; trying to sound comforting.

"Was I talking in my sleep?" he asked.

"Yes,"

"How much did you hear?"

"Quite a lot,"

"What did you hear?" he asked.

"Um, well, I think you were talking to Rey, because you were saying his name and you were telling him that this "girl" only chose him because she was concerned for her mum and that she didn't truly love him. Also, that one day you were going to get her back and that you still had feelings for her," I answered.

"Oh, dammit, I'm so sorry, I was so stupid," he said; holding his head between his hands and sitting up on the bed.

"No, its okay, what's wrong? I mean, it's just a dream…right?" I said; hoping it was.

"No, its not…I don't know how to put it, but Rey…he's going to tell you something about marriages and I was thinking you would've said yes, seeing as your mother would want you to be with him, so I've been having these dreams with you and Rey about me still loving you and I just don't want to let go when you make that decision," he said; trying to hold back tears.

"What about marriages?" I asked him.

"He's going to ask you to marry him, because your mum and his parents arranged for you two to get married," he said.

Wait! My mum planned for me to get married with Rey? But…I just couldn't believe it.

"Rey's going to ask me to marry him,"

"Yeah, he is. And, I was so stupid, I knew this was going to happen, and yet, I had to fall in love with you. I really am sorry, I never meant it to happen like this," he said; finally looking up at me and looking into my eyes.

"No, it's fine. Listen, it wasn't your fault okay? Don't beat yourself up, just because "this" happened," I said.

"Tamayo…it's never going to be okay, Rey's going to propose to you in a week's time, maybe even earlier! And, now that I'm involved I can't let you go, not now, not ever,"

"Jay…" it was the only thing I could say, what else could I have said! For god's sake, I was engaged and I didn't even know.

He started to cry, I couldn't handle him crying, what was I supposed to do? I grabbed his chin and made him look up at me, I smiled.

"Jay, it's going to be fine, I promise. In the end, I always make the right choice, okay? It's going to be fine," I said; not only trying to convince him, but to convince myself too.

"That's what you say now, but, believe me, you are going to pick Rey over me. It's what's best for your mum. I mean, she might find this news a big shock, all the trouble she went through, trying to find a good person for you to get married with, and that was probably one of the reasons why she had a heart attack on the first place. Don't disappoint her,"

I couldn't say anything more that would make this less painful, so instead, I cried alongside him; on his shoulder.

. . .

It was three in the morning until we had stopped crying. We just sat there, I guess, there was nothing else to be said. I didn't know where that left us, but, at least I knew that he was okay.

"Um, are you okay now?" he asked me; trying to look up and smile, but failed.

"Yeah, I'm fine, are you alright?" I said.

"Never been better," he replied; unenthusiastically.

We sat in silence again; awkwardness creeping up. I didn't know what else to say; after everything he's already told me, what more COULD I say!

"Um, it's three in the morning, I think we should get some sleep," he suggested.

"Ugh, sure," I replied.

I layed on the bed; trying to fall asleep, but just couldn't. I didn't know if Jay felt the same way, but I knew it was going to be a matter of time before morning came, and I had to be awake at that time to confront Rey.

. . .

It was morning; I could see the light seeping through the window. I got up and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I got out Jay was up and looking out the window, I approached him slowly…trying to scare him, but he turned around before I could.

"Good morning," I said; trying to sound happy.

"Oh, hey. Good morning," he replied.

"You okay?" I asked; coming closer and rubbing his back.

"Yeah, fine," he answered.

"Look, Jay…I know how hard it may be for you, but, I do love you," I said.

"I know you do, and that's why I love you back," he said; turning around and putting his hands on mine. "Look, let's just enjoy the time we have together as much as we can, okay?" he said.

"Yeah, of course," I said; smiling.

He smiled back…YAY! His smile was back

"Um, want to go to the park before we go to the school?" I asked him, seeing as there was nothing else to do.

"Yeah, sure," he said; smiling.

"Cool, we can pick up breakfast there,"

"Yup,"

We got dressed, grabbed our bags and started walking to the park; holding hands…of course. I was getting used to the fact of holding his hand in public.

"Where do you want to get breakfast?" he asked me.

"Um, there," I said; pointing at a small café near the park.

"Okay, cool. Let's go, I'll pay,"

"No, I'll pay, you've already wasted $90 on me, so I'll pay for breakfast, okay?" I said.

"No, but a gentlemen always-"

I pressed my lips against his; this time interrupting him, haha…revenge! I broke it off, seeing his startled face. I smiled and winked at him.

"Hehe, I'll pay," I said.

"Mmmk then," he said; clearing his throat.

I ran to the café; Jay trying to keep up. I went inside the door and looked at the board at the food they were selling. I think I was going to go with the ham and cheese croissant, sounded nice and warm.

"What do you want?" I asked Jay; who was also looking up at the board.

"Um, whatever your having," he answered.

"Okay then," I said; going up to the counter. "Hello, can I please have two ham and cheese croissants," I said; smiling at the woman.

"Yup, sure. That's $5, thanks," she said.

I gave her the money and waited on the side for our ham and cheese croissants. It didn't take long before it was wrapped and finished. I grabbed it from the woman and handed one to Jay.

"Here ya go," I said; smiling up at him.

"Thanks," he replied; smiling back too.

"No problem, so, do you want to go to the park and eat this? Or do you want to eat it here?" I asked him.

"Um, well, the park seems more romantic than this place, so…the park," he said; smiling.

"Okay, cool," I replied; walking towards the park…him following me.

. . .

We sat down on one of the benches and ate our breakfast. Again, we didn't talk…but it was…nice, I guess. There was no one else in the park besides a couple of children and their parents. Besides them, it was just "us," me…and Jay.

Jay got up from his seat and started walking away…

"Where are you going?" I asked him.

"The bin," he said; holding up his rubbish while smiling.

He turned away and walked to the bin, which was on the other side of the park. It didn't take him long before he was sitting back next to me. He look worried…

"Hey, you okay?" I asked him; after swallowing my food, whole.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just…thinking," he said; looking up, smiling.

"What about?"

"The usual…you,"


	15. The Fight

"Oh, okay then," I said; taken back "What about me?"

"Um, just the whole marriage thing and everything I told you last night, and yeah. I'm still trying to process everything," he answered.

"Look, Jay. I just want to help you in every way possible, just to see you happy again. Please…don't be so sad. I will talk to Rey and tell him everything, and my very own opinion, but, please…don't be sad just because of what you think "might" happen in the future," I said; finishing my breakfast.

"Well, that's the problem…I'm trying, I really am, but, I just don't think I can. I guess, it's something that is uncontrollable," he replied. "Let's just go to school,"

"Alright then, let's go," I said; getting up and holding his hand to drag him out of the seat too.

. . .

We arrived at school; both emotionally sad and tired. We got our books from our lockers and headed to homeroom, but, there…I saw Rey. I approached him and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Can I have a word with you," I said; while he was turning around to look at me.

"Yeah, sure," he said; getting out of his chair and following me, somewhere further away from his friends. "What can I do for you?" he said; smiling.

"Well, let's start off by…telling me the truth," I said.

"I don't know what you're talking about,"

"Were you going to propose to me?" I said.

"Who told you that?"

"Jay,"

"Oh, damn! Well, yes, I was, but it was our parent's idea, not mine,"

"But you agreed, didn't you?" I said.

"Yeah, I did, but that was only because I was starting to gain feelings for you," he answered; grabbing my arms firmly.

"Yeah, well your too late, I'm already in love with Jay," I said; trying to free myself from his grip, but struggled. He was too strong.

"Stop struggling and I'll let you go," he said.

I stopped and looked up at him…into his eyes. It was a very bad idea to do that, because, after, he let me go and kissed me…he actually kissed me. I've always dreamt of this day to come, and it was just the way I imagined it. I was so ashamed, how could I do this to Jay!

I broke it off and ran away. "Tamayo!" I heard Rey screaming behind me, but I didn't look back or turn around. It was too shameful to even look at him any more.

I kept running until I bumped into Jay, who grabbed me by the arms and looked at me in the eyes; I simply just turned away.

"Are you alright Tamayo?" he asked me.

I freed myself and ran away again, this time…heading for the girls toilets. I couldn't go anywhere else that wouldn't make me feel guilty. I locked myself in one of the cubicles and cried…simply…cried, I let all of my remaining tears flow down from my face and sat there.

After all of the bad things I had done, this would have been the worst. I mean, Rey kissed me and I like it! I actually even wanted more! I didn't deserve Jay, or Rey. I didn't deserve anyone…love is cruel…I know that now!

. . .

I got out from the toilets to find that there was a fight going on in the grass area, so I hurried there, half expecting the people who were involved in the fight…and, of course…I was right.

"What did you tell her!" Jay screamed; grabbing Rey's shirt and pushing him of the ground.

"Nothing that concerned you…look, it's not my fault my parents arranged with her parents to get us married, and, it's definitely not my fault that you fell in love with her!" Rey said back; trying to kick Jay on the face…it failed.

"Everything about her concerns me! Just tell me what you did and I'll put you down," Jay said; threatening him.

"Okay, fine…I…kissed her," he said. Jay let go and Rey fell on the floor.

Jay walked away, but before he could go get away from the crowd, Rey rushed to him…fist ready.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!" I screamed out; realising what Rey was going to do.

Everyone froze; including Rey and Jay and looked at me. "It's not right. You shouldn't be fighting because of this…if…if this is what it has ended up as, then, I don't want anything to do with this anymore…I'm out…with both of you," I said; turning away and heading to homeroom. Here came another round of tears.


	16. One thing after another

When the bell had ringed; I went into homeroom, hoping Jay wouldn't be there before me, but…he was. He got up from his chair and approached me. Thank God it was only us in the classroom.

"Um, Tamayo…I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to go off at Rey like that, it was just…I didn't like it when he made you cry. I'm just really sorry," he said; looking at the floor.

I didn't want to be angry at him, but I couldn't just forgive him like that…

"Its fine Jay, I was just upset, plus, I should be saying sorry to you. I mean, he kissed me, and I felt like I had no intention of breaking it, and it just didn't seem right for you. Everything is just so complicated," I said; starting to cry again.

He grabbed me and wrapped me into a hug…I was crying in his arms. Being in his arms again made me feel comforted…special.

"Shh, it's going to be alright. You'll see. One day, we'll all be happy," he said; comforting me.

I let go and smiled at him, tears still falling from my eyes.

"Thanks," I said.

"Okay, cool…so, are we good?" he asked me.

"Of course we are," I said; kissing him lightly.

"That's good then," he said; clearing his throat.

We sat down in our seats and waited for everyone to come; including our teacher…I wonder what was happening…everyone was late…! Then, a boy named Jack came running in puffing.

"Guys, come out…you have to see this, especially you…Tamayo," he said; still puffing and motioning us to come with his hands.

Jay and I got up from our seats and ran behind Jack to the…grass area? There, I saw loads of people; including teachers gathered around in a circle. What the hell was happening?

Everyone looked towards me as someone screamed, "Here she is!" I didn't know who it was, but it was freaky. Two guys came and grabbed my hand; making me leave Jay behind…they walked towards the circle and everyone was making space for me to come through.

As soon as I was in the circle I saw Rey there…with a sign…saying:

Will you marry me, Tamayo?

He smiled; and grabbed my hand…holding it against his. He then kneeled down on one knee and held a ring on his other hand; looking up at me he said the words…


	17. A question of love

Will you marry me, Tamayo?

He smiled; and grabbed my hand…holding it against his. He then kneeled down on one knee and held a ring on his other hand; looking up at me he said the words…

"Tamayo…I know I may not have known you for long, or I may have not been with you a lot, but, the feelings I have for you are stronger than anything I've ever felt before. I know that this marriage was arranged by our parents, but, either way…I would have still fallen in love with you, so Tamayo….will you marry me?" he asked; holding up the ring higher and smiling at me.

Everyone was whispering, "Say yes, say yes," but I didn't know how I felt…did I want to marry him? No, I didn't, because I loved Jay…more.

Before I had said no a flash of my mum collapsing because I had chosen Jay came into my head; just like my dream…I was afraid. I didn't want her to collapse again; I had to consider my mum too. So, who do I go with? Jay…or Rey?

I guess, there really was only one option to choose from…considering everything…the way I felt, my mum and yeah…everything.

By that time, everyone was silent and waiting for my answers; eagerly. I smiled back at him and said…

"Yes, I will,"

Everyone cheered and Rey got up from his kneeling position; put the ring on my finger and hugged me. I turned to look where Jay was…he was smiling to, mouthing to me:

"If you're happy with the decision you made, then I'm happy too,"

I tried not to start crying again. I mean, Rey kisses me and I don't want it to stop, then, now…I choose Rey over Jay…I'm such an awful person…

. . .

The teachers broke up the gathering and we all headed to our homerooms; everyone congratulated me as I walked through the hall, I just smiled back and thanked them. I still didn't know if it was the right choice…

When I walked into homeroom, Jay was sitting down and so were a number of my classmates, again, they congratulated me…

I sat next to Jay and smiled at him; awkwardly.

"Hey," I said.

"Hello," he said; happily.

"Um, I'm really sorry Jay, I mean…I didn't mean to, I was only thinking of my mum at that time, and it just blurted out, I didn't mean to hurt you like this," I said; feeling really bad at this stage.

"Look, its fine. If you're happy, then that's good enough for me, but, I do still love you," he said; smiling at me.

"Thanks Jay...it really means a lot to me that we're still friends, and, for the record, I still love you too," I said; smiling back at him…well, trying to smile back at him.

. . .

Homeroom had ended and everyone was still congratulating me; I didn't even know half of the people who were! I walked alongside Jay…not knowing what to say to him, but, I guess, for now…it was best not to say anything to him.

We walked into our classroom and took a seat at the back row. We sat there for five minutes in total silence before I found it too weird that neither of us were talking to each other.

"So, um, what are you doing this weekend?" I asked Jay.

"Um, nothing really. Probably just staying home. Oh, that reminds me, your mum comes home today, right?" he asked.

"Um, I think so, I'm not sure though, but yeah,"

"Oh, okay then. Well, if she doesn't I can stay with you again tonight, if you want to…as friends, nothing more," he said.

"Sure, I'd like that," I replied; smiling at him.

"Alright then, cool,"

"Yeah…um, so…you're not angry, right?

"No, of course not. Like I said, if you're happy then that's enough for me. I just want to see you smiling, that's all. I just hate it when someone really important to me is unhappy; it just makes me feel useless,"

"Well, that's good then,"

Our teacher walked into the room and the whole room fell silent. He sat down and called out the role…

. . .

Time had passed by so quickly in the class that I didn't even realise when the bell ringed for period two. I got up and walked out of the room. There, I saw Rey standing at the door waiting for me; smiling. Oh yeah, I had history! The only lesson I didn't have Jay in…

Jay walked out of the door…

"See you laters Tamayo," Jay said.

"Yeah, see ya," I replied.

Rey stopped him by holding onto his shirt.

"Hey, no hard feelings, right?" Rey asked Jay.

Jay looked at me before he turned back to answer Rey.

"No, none at all," he said; as he was walking to his class I looked to see if he was hurt in any way possible.

"Anyways, let's get a move on. Wouldn't want to be late," he said; smiling at me and grabbing my hand.

I just nodded and walked alongside him…

We walked in silence until Rey decided to break it up.

"So, um…want to go to the formal with me? I know it's a long way away, but, hey…it would be good to get ready earlier," he said.

Haha, Jay beat you to it…wait! What the hell was I saying, I was suppose to be sorry for him, not happy that Jay asked me first =="

"Um, well…the problem is, I'm already going with Jay. He already paid and wrote down our names, so yeah, sorry," I answered; looking up at him…hoping I didn't upset him already.

"Oh, it's alright. I understand," he said; not really sounding like he did understand.

We walked into class; I seated where I usually sat…I thought that Rey was going to sit with his friends, but…I guess I was wrong.

"So…it's just a question…and I want the honest truth. Do you love Jay more than you love me?" he asked me.


	18. Remembering 3

I wanted to tell him so badly how I really felt, but…I didn't want to break another heart today, did I? But…again, I guess…I had to do something good today.

"Yes, I do love him more than I love you. I've…never felt like this towards someone, not even you. I don't mean to break your heart, but I do love him more," I said; looking down at my table…thinking about him.

"Then, just a question…why did you choose me?" he asked.

"Because of my mum. I had this dream where she collapses because I chose Jay over you, and I wasn't sure if that was a sign or something, but, I just didn't want to see it happen in real life," I answered.

"Oh, okay then. Well, it's your decision. I just hope just hope you made the right one," he said; lying back on his chair…smiling.

"I hope so too," I replied; trying to smile, but failed.

Our teacher walked in; congratulated Rey and I and started the lesson. I guess I zoned out during the lesson, thinking about only one thing…did I do the right thing? I mean, as much as I loved Rey I just didn't feel it with him, but, with Jay everything was there…love, friendship, laughter, smiles…EVERYTHING! I…just…didn't…know.

"Tamayo?" the teacher called; looking worried. I looked at the teacher wondering what was happening. "Do you want to come and go with Rey to the library to photocopy a couple of sheets for me?" he asked me.

I looked at Rey standing there telling me to come, while everyone; including the teacher was staring at me.

"Um, sure," I finally answered; getting up from my chair and then walking over to where Rey was standing.

He got the papers from the teacher and we both walked off; together. Before we left the door, Rey grabbed my hand and he held it against his. Everyone started clapping and cheering…even the teacher (weird, I know) =="

Rey and I walked along the hallway; still holding hands. It was very quiet without everyone crowding around the hallway. I could hear our footsteps walking along the floor _click clack click clack click. _

"Um, so…you want to hang out with me at lunch time?" Rey asked me.

"Um, sure…if you want to," I replied back.

"Awesome,"

"Yeah…" That was the end of our conversation.

. . .

We finished photocopying the papers pretty quickly. We walked back to our classroom and into the empty hallways again. I glimpsed in one of the classroom to find Jay sitting down in the front row. As I looked in he looked at me; our eyes met…I looked away quickly, walking faster to my classroom. Rey was having a hard time catching up to me.

We walked into our classroom again and Rey had handed the teacher the copies we had just printed and then he sat down besides me; looking at me.

The rest of the lesson went by slowly…I listened, I talked, and I worked (shocking, I know) and by the end of our lesson I was tired of thinking.

. . .

Lunch came quickly and I was hanging out with Rey and his  
"gang." It was weird sitting there, I wasn't use to it.

I looked around the school; trying to find Jay. I found him near the year 7 building; sitting alone, but, at least a whole bunch of girls kept coming up to him…I wasn't jealous, so, why did I get up and start walking towards him?

"Hey Tamayo. Where are you going?" Rey asked; shouting from behind me.

"Um, no where…I'll see you later," I answered; still walking towards Jay.

He didn't reply back after he saw who I was going to. I stood in front of Jay and smiled at him; he looked up.

"Hello," I said; taking a seat next to him.

"Oh, hey," he replied back.

"How are you?" I asked.

"Lonely…but good, you?" he answered.

"Could be better,"

"Oh, really…whys that?"

"Don't know, I just feel that way,"

"Okay then, fair enough," he said; smiling at me…I smiled back. "Um, so…did you leave Rey just to come sit with me?" he asked.

"Basically," I answered.

"Haha, well…thanks. I needed someone to talk to,"

"You're welcome,"

"Are we still walking home together or is Rey dropping you home?" Jay asked me.

"No, you're walking with me. Plus, you're staying over night, right?"

"Um, yeah…if your mum doesn't come back home today,"

"Haha, cool," I replied; smiling at him.

"You know, you don't have to stay with me for the whole lunch, you can go now…if you want too," he said.

"No, its fine, I don't want you to be alone again. I feel bad enough, please don't make me feel worse," I said; looking at the ground, trying not to meet his gaze. I heard him sigh from next to me.

"Thanks, but you don't have to feel bad. I'm happy for you. Haha, when's the wedding? Am I invited?" he asked; with that same happy smile he's always had.

"Um, I'm not really sure really. Yes, of course you're invited," I said; looking up at him and smiling too.

We didn't really talk about much during lunch. There really is nothing to talk about when it comes to talking with your "ex-boyfriend," but I did still want to be his friend, even if it meant all this awkward tension.

I knew that at some point he would want to walk around; looking like he was going to die of boredom. So I got up from my position and stretched my arms and legs; he just looked at me =="

"Come on, let's go on and walk. There's no use sitting here if we're not going to do or say anything," I told him. He got up just as soon as I said the words 'go on and walk.' Haha, he was so adorable ."

We started walking around the school; just like on the first day where I had to take him around the school; telling him about it, but, the only difference is that then, everything was fine and simple…but, now, everything was complicated and messed up.

"Haha feels like the first day I came here and you were taking me on a tour around the school," Jay said; like he was reading my mind.

"Yeah, I was just thinking that," I replied.

"Well, you know what they say…great minds think alike,"

"Yeah, well, I'm no great mind, maybe you are though," I said.

"Believe me, I'm not," he replied.

That was the end of conversations…for a while. I tried not to walk to close to Jay; I didn't want to make him think that I wanted to be really close to him (I mean, I did, but I didn't want to show it), but I didn't try to be too far away from; I didn't want him to think that I hated him and it looked like he was doing the exact same thing.

. . .

The bell had ringed for period 5. I had a pretty fun time talking to Jay afterwards, it felt like we could actually talk to each other again, not that awkward atmosphere we had a few minutes ago.

"Haha, yeah, that was funny. I hope it'll be just as fun as last time," I said; recovering from laughing so much.

"Yeah, I hope so too," Jay replied; recovering from laughing so much too.

I hope we could always talk like this…even if I wasn't "together" with him anymore, even though every time I saw him I would remember his kisses, his hugs, his warm smile, his laughter, his loving words and every time I saw Rey the only person I could think about was…Jay.


End file.
